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Perfectionist | 完美主义的10个迹象

发布时间:2022-04-18 10:31:51 阅读:273 作者:博远教育 字数:2127 字 预计阅读时间:5分钟
导读:完美主义者更像是有着高成就的人们,但也有一些关键的区别。以下是完美主义者的十个特征,你都可以从自己或你认识的人身上发现些特征。这些听起来很耳熟呢?

完美主义被视为“苛刻的要求”。陷入其中的人容易衍生出各种心理问题,容易自责,被失败和挫折打倒,感到消沉和自我价值薄弱。如果你也常对自己设定不切实际的高目标,或者潜意识觉得任何事情都是非黑即白,不易听取别的意见,那么你就很可能陷入了非适应性完美主义。

今天的双语短文向大家介绍完美主义者的10大特征,克服完美主义,寻找快乐成就感。

10 Perfectionist Traits 

10个完美主义特征

Perfectionists are a lot like high achievers, but with some key differences. The following are ten telltale traits of perfectionists, that you may be able to spot in yourself or in the people you know. Do any of these sound familiar?

完美主义者更像是有着高成就的人们,但也有一些关键的区别。以下是完美主义者的十个特征,你都可以从自己或你认识的人身上发现些特征。这些听起来很耳熟呢?

1. All-or-Nothing Thinking

孤注一掷的思考

Perfectionists, like high achievers, tend to set high goals and work hard toward them. However, a high achiever can be satisfied with doing a great job and achieving excellence (or something close), even if their very high goals aren't completely met. Perfectionists will accept nothing less than perfection. "Almost perfect" is seen as failure.

完美主义者,就像高成就者一样,倾向于设定高目标,并为之努力工作。然而,即使高成就者的高目标没有完全实现,他们也可以满足于出色的工作和取得卓越的成就(或类似的成就)。完美主义者则只接受完美。“近乎完美”被视为失败。

2. Being Highly Critical

高度的批判性

Perfectionists are more critical of themselves and others than high achievers. While high achievers take pride in their accomplishments and tend to be supportive of others, perfectionists tend to spot mistakes and imperfections. They hone in on imperfections and have trouble seeing anything else. They’re more judgmental and hard on themselves and on others when "failure" does occur.

完美主义者比高成就者对自己和他人更挑剔。尽管成就高的人会为自己的成就感到自豪,并倾向于支持他人,但是完美主义者则倾向于发现错误和不完美。他们专注于不完美,很难看到其他的东西。当“失败”真的发生时,他们对自己和他人更加苛刻。

3. Feeling Pushed by Fear

被恐惧引领

High achievers tend to be pulled toward their goals and by a desireto achieve them. They are happy with any steps made in the right direction. Perfectionists, on the other hand, tend to be pushed toward their goals by a fear of not reaching them and see anything less than a perfectly met goal as a failure.

取得高成就的人往往会被一种实现目标的欲望所驱使。他们对朝着正确方向迈出的任何一步都感到高兴。相反,完美主义者往往会因为害怕无法实现目标而被推动去实现目标,他们认为任何不能完美实现的目标都是失败。

Perfectionist

4. Having Unrealistic Standards

有着不切实际的标准

Unfortunately, a perfectionist's goals aren't always even reasonable. While high achievers can set their goals high, perhaps enjoying the fun of going a little further once goals are reached, perfectionists often set their initial goals out of reach.

不幸的是,完美主义者的目标并不总是合理的。尽管高成就者可以把目标定得高一些,也许是享受目标达成后走得更远的乐趣,但是完美主义者往往把最初的目标设定得遥不可及。

High achievers tend to be happier and more successful than perfectionists in the pursuit of their goals.

在追求目标的过程中,高成就者往往比完美主义者更快乐、更成功。

5. Focusing Only on Results

只关注结果

High achievers can enjoy the process of chasing a goal as much or more than the actual reaching of the goal itself. Conversely, perfectionists see the goal and nothing else. They're so concerned about meeting the goal and avoiding the dreaded failure that they can't enjoy the process of growing and striving.

高成就的人在追求目标的过程中享受的乐趣,可能和实现目标本身一样多,甚至更多。相反,完美主义者只看到目标,别的什么都看不到。他们太在意实现目标和避免可怕的失败,以至于他们不能享受成长和奋斗的过程。

6. Feeling Depressed by Unmet Goals

对未完成的目标感到沮丧

Perfectionists are much less happy and easygoing than high achievers. While high achievers are able to bounce back fairly easily from disappointment, perfectionists tend to beat themselves up much more and wallow in negative feelings when their high expectations go unmet.

完美主义者远远没有高成就者那么多快乐和随和。尽管高成就者可以从失望中恢复过来,但是完美主义者在他们的高期望没有达到时,往往会把自己打得更惨,陷入消极情绪中。

7. Fear of Failure 

恐惧失败

Perfectionists are also much more afraid to fail than are high achievers. Because they place so much stock in results and become so disappointed by anything less than perfection, failure becomes a very scary prospect. And, since anything less than perfection is seen as a failure, it makes it difficult to get started on anything new.

完美主义者也比高成就者更加害怕失败。因为他们对结果有足够的信心,对任何不完美的事情都感到失望,失败变成了一个非常可怕的前景。而且因为任何不完美的事情都会被视为失败,这会让你很难开始做任何新的事情。

拖延症

8. Procrastination

拖延症

It seems paradoxical that perfectionists would be prone to procrastination, as that trait can be detrimental to productivity, but perfectionism and procrastination do tend to go hand in hand. This is because, fearing failure as they do, perfectionists will sometimes worry so much about doing something imperfectly that they become immobilized and fail to do anything at all.

完美主义者倾向于拖延,这似乎是矛盾的,因为这种特质可能不利于生产力,但完美主义和拖延症确实往往是携手并进的。这是因为,由于他们害怕失败,完美主义者有时会过分担心做某事不完美,以至于他们变得行动迟缓,什么都做不成。

Procrastination can lead to greater feelings of failure, further perpetuating a vicious and paralyzing cycle.

拖延症会导致更强烈的失败感,进一步形成恶性循环。

9. Defensiveness

防御性

Because a less-than-perfect performance is so painful and scary to perfectionists, they tend to take constructive criticism defensively. This makes them different from high achievers who can see criticism as valuable information to help their future performance.

由于不完美的表现对完美主义者来说是如此痛苦和可怕,他们倾向于以防御性的方式接受建设性的批评。这使他们不同于高成就者,后者将批评视为有助于未来表现的宝贵信息。

10. Low Self-Esteem

自尊心低

High achievers tend to have equally high esteem; not so with perfectionists. Perfectionists tend to be very self-critical and unhappy and suffer from low self-esteem. They can also be lonely or isolated as their critical nature and rigidity can push others away as well. This can lead to lower self-esteem.

高成就的人往往有同样高的自尊;完美主义者则不然。完美主义者往往非常自我批评,不快乐,自尊心低下。他们也可能是孤独或孤立的,因为他们批判性的本性和僵化也会把别人推开。这可能会导致自尊心下降。

Summary

总结

Healthy perfectionism can drive people to perform their best, but unhealthy perfectionism can lead to stress, anxiety, low self-esteem, and other problems that can affect your quality of life. Perfectionists are often critical, driven by fear, have unrealistic expectations, fear failure, and are defensive when they face any criticism.

健康的完美主义可以驱使人们表现得最好,但不健康的完美主义会导致压力、焦虑、自卑和其他影响你生活质量的问题。完美主义者通常是挑剔的,受恐惧的驱使,有不切实际的期望,害怕失败,并且在面对任何批评时都是防御性的。

A Word From Verywell

健康小提示

If you see some of these perfectionist traits in yourself, don't despair. Recognizing that a change may be needed is a very important first step. Once you recognize how these tendencies might be affecting you negatively, you can begin working toward taking a healthier approach that will still allow you to achieve your goals with less stress and negativity.

如果你在自己身上看到这些完美主义的特质,不要绝望。认识到可能需要改变是非常重要的第一步。一旦你意识到这些倾向可能会对你产生负面影响,你就可以开始采取一种更健康的方式,让你在更少的压力和消极的情况下实现目标。

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